To keep or not to keep....

So if you read the previous post, I had met with my oncologist post surgery 3 weeks ago and was told they believed they removed all the cancerous tissue but she needed to meet with her pathology team to discuss results in further detail. Well they met, they discussed and I went back in to chat with my oncologist yesterday....I ended up going alone to this appointment and really not thinking much of it as we already knew the outcome and the steps ahead....Note to self, always bring another adult in tow to help balance the thought processes required with these types of appointments. You never know what curve balls they may be throwing at you...

Steps ahead remain the same with some slight tweeks....The surgery will now be done by the oncology team instead of the run of the mill gynecologist. So, as excited as I was to finally have managed to get that appointment booked with the gynecologist, it is now going to be cancelled. Honestly, one less doctor involved in my case is fine by me. Explaining and repeating is beginning to be exhausting. So what I need to do now and by next Thursday when I will go back yet again to chat with my oncologist is....to keep my ovaries or to have them removed when they will go in to remove the cervix, uterus, fallopian tubes. If you are thinking "why not? What's the big deal", well to me, it is a big deal. Menopause at 38 is not my idea of fun, ideal or the best option, or the only option for that matter. I was hoping to get some genetic testing done prior to having to make this decision but the feeling of my doctor is to not wait too long and to get this done. Also to add to the mix of things, I now have to look into the status of my kidneys. Surprise! I have a malformation of the uterus which I've known for years but one fun fact associated with this malformation is not only the interesting shape of the uterus but that you can sometimes only have one kidney, you can have two kidneys but only one functional kidney, or you could have two kidneys but one is not where it is supposed to be. So they need this information going forward. If I only have one functional kidney, that is fine and you can live out your whole life without any problems but could be interesting to say the least should it eventually chose to fail. Fun times. Fun times. That ultrasound is next Wednesday and comes with the fun of fasting for 6 hours and the appointment is mid-afternoon. My stomach, which already tends to get loud when hungry, will for sure be growling like a grizzly by 2pm.

As for the genetics testing, I had both my oncologist paging her counterpart in genetics to try and get me seen quickly, her assistant also on the phone with her colleague at CHEO Genetics to see about getting me in...so I know I am being cared for. What I was told is that I need to go ahead and start the process with or without the genetic info. Yikes.

So here are my options to consider:
Option 1 - sign consent form agreeing to have the ovaries removed with the rest of the 'kit' and be done with it. Then deal with the menopause stuff....
Option 2 - sign consent form with stipulation that they will keep one of my ovaries in, simply so I do not go into premature menopause. Then once I have genetic testing, if I have a mutation in BRCA1 and BRCA2, then go back under the knife to have the last ovary removed. (yes it's an extra surgery but the way I see it, if I do not have a mutation, then my quality of life at this point would be much better with not going through all the fun stuff associated with early menopause).
Option 3 - take a chance and postpone the whole hysterectomy until I have more genetic information. Risk here is that cancer cells begin to grow again and then who knows what repercussion that would bring. 

All this being said, I'm not looking for guidance or advice or points of view but am primarily writing this as a promise to keep you all informed on the developments in my situation. Also I am writing this down as it is helping me clear my brain and will in turn help me come to a decision that I will feel comfortable with, no matter the outcome. This is my life, my body and I don't take these decisions lightly and will make what is right for me. Might not be for you and you or you, but it is for me. I have had wonderful guidance from my team of specialist, great advice and know that I am supported in whichever decision I chose to make. The support I have had from all my friends, family, colleagues to date has been so great I can't even begin to explain. It means a lot to have you all there in whichever way you are and I thank you for that.

So...to keep or not to keep....until next week my friends.....
XOXO